Pigeon Brain

When I can’t think of what to say,

I will put my lonely where my mouth is,


a buckshot matryoshka always killing myself

and shredding the old skin for something new,


always molding my gray-clay brain

into the easiest target. I’ve been breathing long enough


to know that breathing isn’t enough and because of that

I’m always breathing too quickly, quiet and bright


in my two tiny clots of lung. I’ve been surviving long enough

to know that surviving isn’t enough


so now I’m giving living a try, an unkilned brick of being,

aiming for the window where the gray birds sit reflected


balancing on electric wire, grinning.


“pigeon brain” is a poem I wrote in 2018. It was published in local nomad, which you can read online.